december 31, 2002


/you could be more delicious
cornelius - star fruits surf rider

spasm,

01_ an involuntary and abnormal muscular contraction
02_ a sudden violent and temporary effort or emotion

mostly behind door number 02
slightly peppered with some 01


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december 23, 2002


/joe strummer 1952-2002

joe strummer 1952-2002

joe strummer r.i.p.
the obituary from the new york times

are you taking over
or are you taking orders?
are you going backwards,
or are you going forwards?

from "white riot" by the clash


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/touched by a priest
wizo - r.a.f.

or rather a priest in training, a priest still in his education, and apparently in schools for men of such sort, you take shitloads of philosophy. he's a fan of aristotle. he says it's difficult and one of the biggest challenges of being a priest is the sometimes overbearing loneliness one will probably have to live with. it's quite a restriction, the physical one that ultimately seems to disturb the emotional one.

thinking to myself, a sudden uncontrollable outburst of free actions? even the denial of a powerful physical function, especially the denial of such, now thats what really heats up in the moment of fiery lustful orgasm as it escapes and envelops the outer atmosphere.

but these are just thoughts right. and the way the gay priest in training collected feels of my flaccid left bicep, a blood bath waiting to happen i swear to fucking god.


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december 20, 2002


/my connection is your connection
can - connection

the other night jason told me everything i needed to hear. im turning 21 pretty soon and he thinks i should stand up for myself once in a while. but i cant help thinking about her crying fit, my dad going over and asking her if she needs to go to the hospital, a scene of tear juice and uncontrollable behaviour, i wondered what the fuck i did, what i was doing wrong, if it was the outside asshole or my sexual desires causing such harm.

if you want to really fucking scare me just lose control, one sunny afternoon.

i'll hide under my desk crying with a stuffed animal just like i used to when dad got pissed oh jesus what is this stupid rebellion bullshit.

i used to tell my parents i'd run away to teach them a lesson, what kind of reaction. i guess kids do this shit.

i just want some bone and especially some cuddling in front of a fireplace, but i dont wanna jerk anymore tears so please help help hmm i think the best way out is to devise a plan that pushes limits envelopes even, but not to the point of merciless execution, neglection, in other words something that is healthy for everyone. and guess what i think i'm ready to put forth the effort, make things work.

ps johnny i think youd really dig normalnatural


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december 18, 2002


/correspondence with a 6th grader, part 04
wendy carlos - winter

"guess what elese on wendsday theirs goin to be a dance party in my theater class dedicaed to me 'cause everyone likes the way i dance and they laugh at me 'cause i do the robot and other stuff and stuff like elain on sinfield its funny and i told me teacher 'man we should totally have a dance party on wendsday!' and he said hed ask the other kids if they want one and when he asked everyone said 'yeah lets have one yay' and the teacher said 'itll be great well have food/games/jessica danceing and everyone was laughing and clapping and another kid said ' wait i dance good too ' and everyone stopped clapping and my friend zach said ' were clapping for jessica not you ' and it was funny man i RULE in the 6th grade really"

this kid is fucking genius dont you agree.


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/rise of the fucking machines
the roots & talib kweli - rhymes and ammo

OH HELL YES

and a little love for my fellow cheek lover jose


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december 17, 2002


/too steep to climb
pink floyd - fearless

it wasnt so much a surprise as much as it was a release, for him. i knew he wouldve came out to me eventually, i mean after that night where he played tonsel hockey with that gross dude i saw it coming. straight guys might make out with other guys at parties when theyre drunk, but theyre not gonna invite them into their pants later that night. we set limits for ourselves, restraints, but struggle on where to draw the line, where to exit, where to attack, where to drain bodily fluids, where to spread acrylic on canvas, or other various surfaces, each one with its own consistency and ability to prevent yellowing, or decay as we sometimes call it.


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december 15, 2002


/still dont got it
dead prez - we need a revolution

the two girls with striped shirts, red on right, black on left, well they stood in front of the fake christmas tree, some lady with a polaroid camera goes "ok now squeeze in and pretend like you love each other" and the girls looked scared but did as they were instructed and there you go, a christmas family polaroid, our two girls, possibly twins, looking so happy according to our relatives on the postcards we sent out a few days late by accident honey what the fuck is wrong with you???

and then the ladies who give us the correct allergy dosage approximately once at least every 48 hours, well they got a new computer so now we dont have to sign anything anymore but the computers can understand, record, but not interpret the events, yet they oragnize things extremely well, for nonthinking entities.

i once collected some words about artificial intelligence, a.i. as a form of superthought in a nonorganic environment unsuitable for emotions or free thought, but merely a synopsis of ultimate storage capabilities, with a heavy reliance on practicality and social malfunction, almost.


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december 6, 2002


/gay asian doom metal listening jew
cryptopsy - shroud

two free frescas, grapefruit flavoured pop now theres a fucking concept, one at the film screening and one at the gallery, along with free cookies and fruity pound cake, i am a happy boy, my first piece in a public gallery, "the world trade center," mixed media on cardboard, selling for less than 100 bucks so hurry over and consume eat it up.

me and dan walked around and checked out the gallery men ha, yep gaylords love art openings, and me, well i've been flirting a lot lately (well a lot for most recent behavioural patterns). mustve overcome some hurdles, a minor difficulty, then my nips got erect via coldness last night as i walked over to blake's apt for some free beverage, crystal light and vodka, no one can match the rainbow of a gay asian doom metal listening jew with a sparkling pink girly drink not even fucking close, shooting out of my cheeks, in fantastic blasts, bolts.


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december 4, 2002


/his pipe cutting machine
symphony x - church of the machine

after not even knowing this dude for an hour, he's already showing me his favourite porn on his computer, college age swimming white boys. he really needed someone to talk to. i had some free time. before that night i never even said more than my name to him, an introduction at some point, but we bumped heads while i was picking up my thai food. he likes hitler too, or at least appreciates incredible events/apparitions.

in other news blind guardian fucking detroyed and so did symphony x, two instances of alcohol into the night, i noticed the dude with the horrendous mullet was the only dude in the club with a lover attached to him. figures.

so these jocks asked me to play some bball with them today, i got to feel the hot ones member as he set a nice pick for his teammate. note to self work on your fucking jumpshot. and dont get nervous.

exploring educational facilities open past midnnight, stealing 80s air force brochures from the ROTC, catching janitors reading in the hallway rather than cleaning, the guy with the big forearms showing me how to use his pipe cutting machine on the 11th floor of the science building. i'm exhausted.


> 8 reactions






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